“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” Matthew 6:25-26
If you have spent any amount of time in Church, there is a good chance that you have heard this verse a time or two. Growing up, I heard this verse and just knew that I was supposed to trust God and not be anxious about anything. Simple, right? Well, it is definitely easier said than done.
I spent years wrestling with anxiety in high school and college. For several months, I was going to a Christian counselor to walk through the depths of my anxiety. It seemed like it was something I would always struggle with, but through a series of events in 2018, God broke a lot of the chains of anxiety in my life. However, there are still moments where my anxiety will pop up and reveal when my heart is not trusting in truth about who God is.
A few weeks ago, God, in His grace, allowed my anxiety to pop up, requiring me to look to Him instead of myself. As I was waiting for a paycheck, thinking about housing for next year, and hoping that God would provide more support for the upcoming year, the Lord gently reminded me that my anxious thoughts were because of a lack of trust in Him and His goodness. Immediately after realizing what my heart was doing, I stopped and prayed, asking God to help my heart believe truth where it was believing lies.
You see, in me confessing my disbelief, I was then professing my need for Jesus. I need Jesus. As I was praying, I felt a deep peace, believing that God would provide for every need, even if it did not look like I had originally planned.
In everything that I was anxious about, God showed up and provided more than I could have imagined. Not only did I get my paycheck, but my tax return came back, giving me an extra cushion of money. With housing for next year, a group of girls here in Puerto went to look at a house, and unanimously, we all knew that God was providing this house for us to share next year for cheaper than what each of us are paying this year on rent. Lastly, God has given me an incredible support team that is so quick to jump in to support where needed!
God provides. He always has, and He is faithful to who He is. Therefore, He will always be faithful to provide, and I can trust in Him. After the past two weeks or so, I have been so encouraged by God’s provision in my life. He so graciously reminded me of His character in reminding me of my need to rely on Him and Him alone.
“The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.”Psalm 23:1